My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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