ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
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I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
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I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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