Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
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dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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