Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
