I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
this boner is exhausting
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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