My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize