I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
