Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..

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(682): View more from Texas

While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.

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(713): View more from Texas

He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(646): View more from New York

How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"

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(620): View more from Kansas

Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.

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(703): View more from Virginia

WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'

(661): View more from California

The cougar kind?

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(703): View more from Virginia

Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.

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