You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize