it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
