i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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