What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
