and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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