is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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