Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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