Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
