At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
