you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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