We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
