Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
BRING THE BAGELS
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
