sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I will pee on everything he values.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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