Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He did a backflip because drugs
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