i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
