This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
