She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
