Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
