It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
