I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
