Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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