i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
