Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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