I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize