friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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