where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
