all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
We talked him into tasing himself.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
