So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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