Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
