no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
this boner is exhausting
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You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
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It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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