hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
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