4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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