i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
