Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
