Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Acid is not a monday night drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize