forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
