I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
