Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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