i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize