Nicole vs. Life
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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