ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
