I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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